10 ways of increasing confidence in blogging

10 ways of increasing CONFIDENCE inLuckily I have had bags of confidence in my life. There have been certain situations where I might have been shy, or quiet, but mostly I would say that I am a confident, outgoing, chatty and friendly person.

Which has helped me a lot in life.

I was one of those people (at work) who didn’t mind standing in a room full of people and presenting to them. And it has never really phased me going into a new social setting when I don’t know many there.

This is mostly because I have hardly any fears.

I just don’t have too much of a fear of failing.

Honestly, I really don’t worry too much what people think of me; nor does it bother me what they might say behind my back. I don’t worry if I might look a fool. Because, for me, I’d rather try and have a go at something – than not.

It would probably upset me if I knew people were laughing at me behind closed doors, or calling me names, but I’m prepared to take risks in life and achieve my goals. It is FAR more important.

And yet fear – the fear of failing or ‘looking stupid’ – holds a lot of people back from success or achieving things in their life. Or hinders them from chasing their dreams. Like getting promoted at work, or writing a book, or joining a new group, or starting their own business.

Take blogging. Within blogging you sit (alone) at a computer, laptop or tablet and create posts. You publish them. But in order for lots of people to read them (which, let’s face it, as a writer you do kind of want) you then need to put yourself ‘out there’. Shout loud and tell everyone what you’re about. Put your work out there for all to see.

Which can be a little scary.

“What if people laugh? What if someone reads it and thinks it is awful? Or, what if no-one reads it and I fail?”

I used to work in Human Resources, and the amount of people I came across who struggled to progress their careers, or develop themselves further, or enjoy their work because of confidence, was astounding. Becoming a Supervisor, or Manager, or presenting to a room of people can be an immense challenge for some. It’s putting yourself out of your comfort zone – and into the hands of other people, who may judge you. The fear of the reaction and comeback of others, can stop people going forward.

So within blogging, or at work, or just in life – it is important to try to conquer fear.

Which (I know) is far easier said than done.

Within writing and blogging, not having a lot of confidence can potentially hold you back. Especially if you do want your blog to be read by lots of people and be ‘successful’…whatever you deem your successes to be.

So here are my 10 ways at increasing confidence in blogging:

  1. Bounce ideas off people. Talk to your partner or best friend about your ideas and gauge their reaction. If they love an idea then it will probably make a great post.
  2. Get a few people to read your posts first, for feedback. Encourage their constructive feedback.
  3. Ask other bloggers for their opinion on a few of your posts.
  4. Don’t let the success of other bloggers stifle your confidence. There will be times when you feel as though everyone else is more ‘successful’ than you. But don’t compare yourself to others. This is a confidence killer. Try not to be jealous when other people seem to be getting far more out of it than you – they probably have really bad days too, they just never tell you!
  5. Remind yourself of what you have achieved. Look back and remember where you have come from. This always helps you to feel good and get your mojo going again!
  6. Look at your Google Analytics or Statistics and see which of your posts have been most popular and write a few more like that.
  7. Make friends on Twitter and Facebook with other bloggers, and build solid and firm relationships. Join in with linky’s and comment on other people’s posts – this will help develop genuine friendships with others, which helps you (especially when you need picking up and having a pep talk!). Blogging can be lonely!
  8. If you’re stressed out about other things in your life, and feel as though blogging is becoming a chore – step back. Have a break for a few days/weeks. Being enthusiastic and refreshed for writing produces better posts.
  9. Don’t copy other people. The moment you try to be another blogger you’ll end up loosing the reasons you started. Stick to your own style and personality and your posts will be better for it.
  10. Use social media to promote yourself regularly. Tell people when you’ve posted, encourage people to read them and promote yourself otherwise no-one will. Most people’s social media timelines are probably full of information, and so unless you are promoting yourself well they will go elsewhere.

And finally, remember that only YOU can achieve your goals/achievements/targets and so don’t let a lack of confidence hold you back from them.

Good luck!!

Mums' Days
Mami 2 Five
Jess Soothill

Jess is a Mother of twins, blogger and writer.

Find me on: Web | Twitter | Facebook


  1. February 20, 2015 / 3:19 pm

    Fantastic post as always! People always tell me I come across confidently. It makes me laugh as I am not confident at all. However, I am driven. I want to do well and if that means pushing myself out of my comfort zones then it is something I am willing to do- I just tremble doing it!! I’ll be nervous tomorrow- just glad it will be you that comes to save me- I can feed off your confidence and then you wont be able to shut me up! x

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 3:22 pm

      I would never have thought you lack confidence! You shock me! Yes some people appear confident but are trembling inside! Once we have a few wines tomorrow we’ll never shut up again!!!!!!!! Can’t wait to see you tomorrow 🙂 Jess xx

  2. February 20, 2015 / 3:36 pm

    I’ve gone through a bit of a confidence drop lately. Like you, in not shy, or particularly lacking in confidence, normally. However, I find promoting myself REALLY hard, even when I write a part that I think is really good x

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 3:40 pm

      I think it’s very normal. However you have to be as out there as you can – sharing as much as possible (without being too OTT) otherwise people won’t know you’re there! Sometimes my posts flop! Which knocks my confidence but I try not to let it for too long. Good luck and hope you get your confidence back soon x

  3. February 20, 2015 / 3:37 pm

    Fab tips! I must try harder not to compare myself to others! I’ve just this minute taken a step back and realised all I’ve achieved so far! 🙂

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 3:47 pm

      That’s just it – don’t compare! But it is TOO easy to do. I do it and then have to stop myself. By focusing on your own achievements and where you have come from, and being positive, better things will come. Glad you are doing this!! Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  4. emz
    February 20, 2015 / 4:21 pm

    Great tips 🙂 no 8 resonates with me at the moment, stepping away from it then coming back definetly helps xx

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 4:31 pm

      I think it does. It’s hard to do, but I think that it helps gets lots of fresh ideas and a fresh perspective. Good luck and thanks for the comment, Jess x

  5. February 20, 2015 / 4:38 pm

    This is a great post & I definitely need to implement some of these tips! Xx

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 5:22 pm

      Thanks! Hope you got something useful from it. Thanks for commenting, much appreciated! Jess x

  6. February 20, 2015 / 4:46 pm

    Perfect advice! Well done. Comparing is the demon we all struggle with eh? Sigh… just keep blogging… just keep blogging…

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 5:23 pm

      Very much so. In all of life though too hey? Natural though I guess. I try not to let it get me down and instead let the success of others inspire me. Jess x

  7. February 20, 2015 / 4:54 pm

    Ooo, you have a similar personality to me. High self esteem is such a good thing to have on your side. There’s little I fear and I’m not overly bother what people think.

    There’s one thing we do differ on though. I hate presenting to people. I don’t fear it; just intensely dislike it. And at work, I was made to do it ALL THE TIME!! Ugh! I worked abroad for years and was one of very few native English speakers in the office, and because I speak quite slowly and with no accent, they made me present soooo much, and be vidoed too. I can’t even think about it without pulling a sucking-lemons face 🙂

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 5:24 pm

      Ha ha! Can we see that face please?? Oh no – fancy having to do that all the time when you didn’t enjoy it! Crikey! We sound very similar the more we get to know each other! We must meet up soon. Jess x

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 5:25 pm

      Good luck – you have one new one now! Me 🙂 Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  8. February 20, 2015 / 8:00 pm

    such a great post! The first two points are so simple but somethings that I never thought of doing. I also worry about being OTT with promothing myself. Love your carefree go get em attitude!

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 9:49 pm

      Thanks for the comment – much appreciated. Jess x

  9. February 20, 2015 / 8:39 pm

    Great post. I really struggle with confidence, and I hate that it bothers me so much what other people think, I haven’t been brave enough to tell anyone in real life about my blog, the only person who knows is Mr R, and the only reason I have kept quiet is because i’m worried what people will think. x

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 9:50 pm

      Oh really?? I wasn’t sure how ‘public’ to go but then I decided to go for it and share it with all my family and friends. Am so glad as so many people have been very supportive x

  10. February 20, 2015 / 9:16 pm

    This is a great post, I would definitely say that I lack confidence not just in terms of blogging, but in general. These points are going to be a great help to me, so thanks!!

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 9:51 pm

      You are most welcome – hope it helps xx Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  11. February 20, 2015 / 10:02 pm

    Really great post Jess; I’m not a confident person and am terrible at worrying what others will think, so I’m saving your post to refer back to when I next feel low about my blog! xx

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 10:05 pm

      Good stuff! I like to do the same – whenever I feel a bit fed up about blogging I read something that inspires me and it helps a lot. Thanks for your lovely comment, and for stopping by. Jess x

  12. February 20, 2015 / 10:16 pm

    Great post! I’m one of those people who flits between confident and shy depending on the situation. If I’m outside my comfort zone I withdraw and let other people take the lead. I’ve got better at putting myself out there over the years but do still find myself missing out on opportunities because I hold back. Thanks for the inspiration! #TheList

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 10:40 pm

      Well I hope you get the opportunities you deserve! go for it. Hope you’re successful. Thanks for the comment, appreciate it x

  13. February 20, 2015 / 10:41 pm

    Such a great post, Jess. I have found myself turning down opportunities lately because I feel like I’m not good enough. I’ve also been finding blogging a bit of a chore so I’m looking forward to taking some time off in March and hopefully feeling refreshed.

    Jenna at Tinyfootsteps xx

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 10:50 pm

      Errrrm you ARE good enough. Your blog is amazing and your writing is touching, funny and brilliant. So none of that!!! Yes we all get knocked back but it’s about learning and bouncing back fighting! Now enjoy that well-earned break 🙂 xx

  14. February 20, 2015 / 10:49 pm

    Great post! Lots of cracking advice that I shall certainly be taking! Xx

    • Jess
      February 20, 2015 / 10:51 pm

      Oh many thanks, glad you found useful. Much appreciated x

  15. February 21, 2015 / 7:30 am

    My last comment seems to have gone! oops. Great post Jess. It’s definitely good to bounce ideas off people and share draft posts, all helps with believing in yourself.

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:55 pm

      Thanks and thanks for persevering to comment! Technology hey?? 🙂 Jess x

  16. Julia@rainbeaubelle
    February 21, 2015 / 7:41 am

    Really like this, I still feel slightly anxious every time I publish a post! There is definitely the thought of what other people might think but I feel the fear and do it anyway!! X

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:54 pm

      Well no need for your anxiety and your posts and blog rock. You should be very confident about your writing and creativity as it is amazing. Beautiful blog xx

  17. February 21, 2015 / 1:00 pm

    This is such good advice treasure! I’ve always had the attitude that I can do whatever I choose, if I put my mind to it. That said, there are certainly days — particularly as I’ve got older — that I’m more hesitant about things!

    Number 10 is the best advice for me — historically I’ve been rubbish at promoting posts but am starting to get much better at it!! I’ve realised that if you don’t push yourself out there, you can disappear without a trace!! 🙂 X

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:54 pm

      You should definitely promote your blog – it is amazing and I am in love with it!! It’s all about getting out to as much as you can, as often as possible – which I am still of course learning too. Thanks for the lovely comment, Jess x

  18. February 21, 2015 / 7:43 pm

    I love these blogging/photography posts you do Jess- such great advice. I am pretty confident too, but the only thing I hate is public speaking, I don’t know why but I used to have to do it a lot for work and I would hate it! xx

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:52 pm

      Thank you so much! I am by no means an expert but I enjoy sharing what I have learnt so far as I remember wanting to know answers to things when I started out. Public speaking can be tough and I know so many who literally hate it!! Glad you’re not subjected to it anymore. Jess x

  19. February 21, 2015 / 11:33 pm

    Love this post, great advise, really useful and inspiring x

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:50 pm

      Many thanks – that is very kind x

  20. February 22, 2015 / 3:48 pm

    Jess I love this, we all have bad days when you doubt yourself and its great to have a support network to help you, I am so lucky to have a wonderful support network and so glad I met each and every one of you xx

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:44 pm

      I know – me too. The support network we have is more than I could ever have imagined. What a lucky group we are 🙂 Jess x

  21. February 22, 2015 / 7:30 pm

    Fab list. #8 and 9 especially resonate with me. When blogging becomes a chore, it’s definitely time to pause and take stock. And we all have a unique voice and ‘something’ to contribute; each one is their best ‘them’. And as such, it’s a waste of time trying to copy; an attempt due to fail.

    Thanks for the tips. #TheList 24

    • Jess
      February 22, 2015 / 7:43 pm

      Thanks for the lovely comment, glad you enjoyed it. Agree – it’s such a unique space and place to be yourself. Thanks, Jess x

  22. February 22, 2015 / 8:50 pm

    I find it hard to believe you don’t have fear of failure. Lucky you! You are certainly right to say that it is the one thing that holds people back from going after their ambitions and dreams.

    • Jess
      February 23, 2015 / 12:21 pm

      Maybe as I am getting older I just don’t care too much what other people think, and I am happy enough to do what I want now. I appreciate people’s feedback and constantly seek it, but I’m happy taking risks and not worrying if they don’t work. Because my view is that even if something doesn’t work it doesn’t really matter and is just a way of learning anyway! Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  23. February 22, 2015 / 10:17 pm

    Fab post and such useful tips. Definitely agree with not trying to copy other bloggers – definitely much better to be true to who you are rather than being a second-rate copy of someone else. Thank you for sharing.

    • Jess
      February 23, 2015 / 12:18 pm

      Thanks so much for the lovely comment, and glad you found it useful. Jess x

  24. February 23, 2015 / 10:09 am

    Fantastic post Jess, so much of it is about confidence to put yourself out there. It can be hard when there are so many other bloggers out there but like you say if you stick to your own style you can’t go wrong! xx

    • Jess
      February 23, 2015 / 12:17 pm

      Thanks Hayley – you’re right and it is important to stick to your own style, even if it is hard! Thanks for the lovely comment, Jess x

  25. February 23, 2015 / 6:36 pm

    Superb tips there huni! Again, another fab post about blogging. I TOTALLY hear you about the whole finding your own voice – it’s crucial to be you otherwise you are a cardboard cut out of someone else! xxxx

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:30 pm

      Yes – and it never sounds the same as when you write for yourself. It is hard not to copy when others seem to be doing so well, but it’s also a matter of time – it seems to take some time to get established and find your audience too! Thanks for the lovely comments, Jess x

  26. February 23, 2015 / 7:35 pm

    I’ll just love these tips – I’m going to keep coming back to this list when I feel a bit thrown sometimes 🙂 #SundayStars

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:27 pm

      Thanks lovely!! Yes me too! Ha ha Jess x

  27. February 23, 2015 / 8:19 pm

    Totally agree with this. Fab post! xx #SundayStars

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:27 pm

      Thank you x

  28. rachel
    February 23, 2015 / 8:35 pm

    Ah Jess you make it sound so easy. Confidence plays such a big part in promoting our blogs. Knowing where to look to network is so important. Very useful tips 🙂

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:27 pm

      Thanks – not easy, just trying to keep myself focused on me and not let anything knock my confidence!! Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  29. February 23, 2015 / 9:51 pm

    Fabulous post as always honey. I wish I had your confidence. Blogging is a odd beast. Sometimes it can be a huge boost to confidence and other times it can make you doubt yourself lots. I definitely need to take these tips on board. Hugs Mrs H xxxx #SundaysStars

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:25 pm

      Thanks for the lovely comment. I know what you mean, you do feel like it’s a roller coaster of a ride this blogging journey! One minute up and next down. I try to stay as focused as I can on myself and not let any knocks get me down. It’s easier said than done though 🙂 x

  30. February 24, 2015 / 11:05 am

    great tips hun i can come across confident but really I’m not at all i get so nervous and possibly play it all a little safe because of that! x

    • Jess
      February 24, 2015 / 12:21 pm

      You really shouldn’t be, your blog is doing so well and you don’t need to feel like that. Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  31. February 26, 2015 / 8:47 pm

    Wonderful post, Jess! I’m forever losing my confidence and my way with blogging but I try and keep myself in check. I love this Sylvia Plath quote “The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt” – I have it in my notebook as a reminder to stop being a dope and just get creative 🙂

    Thanks for linking up to #Thelist lovely xxx

    • Jess
      March 3, 2015 / 10:34 pm

      Thank you so much 🙂 Love that quote. Thanks for sharing. Jess xx

  32. February 27, 2015 / 10:55 pm

    Great list! yes, making friends and having other blogging supporters is awesome!

    • Jess
      February 28, 2015 / 12:29 pm

      Yes fantastic isn’t it? Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  33. February 28, 2015 / 2:34 pm

    Great tips thank you! I’m new to this blogging world and it is a very tricky place to navigate. It’s very easy to get lost amongst the established blogs out there and find readers. Think I just need to put myself ‘out there’ a bit more but the FEAR sets in! x

    • Jess
      February 28, 2015 / 3:09 pm

      Don’t be scared! The blogging world can be quite daunting, I agree, am still daunted now!! However I tend to find most people Ive met are so friendly and helpful. Jess xx Good luck x

  34. Charlotte @ Educating Elsa
    March 1, 2015 / 2:41 pm

    Great post. I find it easier to be confident online and with my blog than I do in real life, but I do still get nervous about it and I think it does hold me back a bit. Sometimes I have ideas which I think would work really well as blog posts but I worry about what people will think or whether someone else has done something similar but better. It can be hard to push past that and do it anyway, especially when your blog is a smaller one and you don’t have the following behind you to make you feel like you know what you are doing!

    • Jess
      March 1, 2015 / 2:55 pm

      I’m sure you will get there as it grows. It takes time. Although I wouldn’t worry about ‘copying’ others – we all write quite similar material all the time! Thanks for the comment, Jess x

  35. Jess
    March 5, 2015 / 10:58 am

    Great, will come and see – and thanks for the comment. Really appreciate it. Jess x

  36. April 2, 2015 / 11:47 pm

    I love this. You’re spot on as I often worry that people are sat in a corner somewhere laughing at me.
    Luckily have a group of very good bloggy friends to help pick me up when I’m down.
    And as someone once told me Don’t compare ourself to others.
    Brilliant post Mrs xx

    • Jess
      April 3, 2015 / 8:06 am

      Exactly. Who cares. Believe in yourself and it will shone through!! I love your writing so much – funny and touching. A fab blog. Jess x

  37. April 16, 2015 / 9:26 pm

    I’m so late to the party haha!
    I love this post so much because it rings so true. It’s definitely hard to have confidence within yourself in the blogging world when there’s SO many wonderful accounts – it’s realising that all accounts are wonderful, especially our own because they hold so much of our life. They mean something!
    Although I did have a laugh about no.6 as my latest one that went pretty big was about my Brother and how close we were to losing him! But I think it was because it was so touching and raw, hard to do without the emotion!


    • Jess
      April 17, 2015 / 7:17 am

      There are so many blogs out there, but it’s keeping focused on your own isn’t it and trying not to get distracted. Thanks for the comment, much appreciated xx

  38. September 15, 2015 / 10:15 pm

    Wise words! I have to keep reminding myself never compare the beginning of my journey to the middle of someone else’s (something that I read in another helpful blog post, from Mum’s Days). I feel confident in my writing but I’m still trying to find my groove with the promotion side of things.

  39. October 5, 2015 / 8:12 pm

    Fab post, so many good points you make! I think all of us bloggers at times can suffer from one or two of these, and as always, it’s nice to know it’s not just you! #TheList

  40. Kara
    March 2, 2016 / 12:59 pm

    You are so awesome Jess, I love how confident you are and most importantly that you are proud.

    You are right fear is the biggest problem and something I am starting a journey on in anyway I can find to help.

    Great read xxx

  41. March 7, 2016 / 11:38 pm

    I love this Jess, such a great post with lots of great tips 🙂 Confidence has always been something that at times I’ve struggled with. Not so much at a basic level, as like you I find myself in a work context often presenting to people, chairing and leading meetings and engaging with execs, but more in terms of really putting myself out there, taking risks and making that one next step that is often needed to really progress and break through those ceilings that only the most confident and fearless seem to be able to do. Similarly with blogging, I’ve mostly stayed in the background only really starting to push myself and go for it this year. I loved reading this post because its really encouraged and motivated to do even more and push myself further with blogging 🙂 Emily x

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