Why having a blog mentor is the best thing I’ve done


I write about being a blogger a lot. I guess it’s because I love it so much and it genuinely is a real passion of mine. In the last 4 years I have always felt the desire to want to sit down and write, and have personally got so much out of it all.

But – as I often say – even though there are plenty of bloggers and freelancers within the virtual world (and a great deal of online support networks) it can still be a tough industry to be a part of.

It can be competitive at times, as well as very isolated. Plus, when you don’t meet up face-to-face with the people you regularly engage with it’s harder to have proper working relationships with them as you would sitting alongside them in a workplace.

Also, one of THE hardest parts of being an influencer and blogger is putting yourself ‘out there’ day after day. When you’re the face of your brand, business, blog, Instagram etc there can be occasions when you struggle to stay empowered and confident. Producing content feels a REAL struggle, at times.

You start comparing yourself to others. Self-doubt creeps in. Especially when you feel as though you’re making a lot of effort but getting little growth or low revenue.

How am I being perceived by my audience?

Is what I am sharing, OK?

Am I on the right track?

Why am I not as successful as those other bloggers?

It is fairly easy enough to get feedback from other bloggers and influencers online though. I’ve made some amazing friends over the last 4 years and these ladies are SO lovely and helpful to me whenever I have a wobble or need advice (and vice versa). They pick me up and I have learnt a lot from them. There are also a lot of freelance networks available and local events supporting new businesses/freelancers.

But, recently something amazing has happened to me that has meant that I’m now feeling more supported, confident, happy, driven and focused more than ever before.

I’ve started a 1-2-1 mentor relationship with another blogger.

Rachel from The Ordinary Lovely blog and I met via blogging about 3 years ago when I lived in North Wales. We met up a few times, joined similar facebook groups and bumped into each other at various events. Our paths crossed quite a lot. We quickly started a friendship and would message each other via text (often to complain at how tired we both were as a result of our children getting us up all through the night!).

Rachel and I are at the same stage in life; she has two little boys who are at school, she’s at the same level in blogging as me, she has similar life goals, a similar corporate and professional background, and – most importantly – we have a similar sense of humour!

But more recently our relationship has now evolved from a friendship, to one where she is actually helping me creatively, as well as helping me to grow and manage my business.

Having-a-blog-mentor How-to-get-a-blog-mentor The-benefits-of-having-a-blog-mentor A-mentor-in-blogging

What’s a mentor?

Pre-twins, I worked in Human Resources for over 10 years and often mentored employees myself. I also helped set mentor relationships up in the workplace too – usually for new managers, or apprentices, or for people looking to change job direction. However, (as I always found), most people at all kinds of levels gain a lot from having a mentor as it’s personal 1-2-1 support and development.

Within blogging there are no set structures as you would experience within an office. No appraisals, no line manager, no HR department and no team. A mentor is thus a great idea for anyone running their own business, setting up a new venture, or for anyone who works in a freelance situation.

How does it work?

Rachel and I catch up via FaceTime every fortnight and we usually talk for a few hours. The call isn’t terribly formal; we leave it open enough to chat about anything that both of us want to cover, but sometimes we will suggest something to the other person to consider giving feedback on. It’s friendly and based purely on support. We discuss each other’s blogs and social media channels and talk through what’s working vs what isn’t.

We’re both mentoring each other – and we make sure both of us feels able to equally support each other.

In-between the calls we also share any good blog posts, articles of interest, advice on new opportunities etc.

How do I get started?

If you feel as though you’d benefit from something similar (I highly recommend it) then I’d suggest reaching out to find someone who you respect and trust – because these two things are imperative to the relationship. This is often why online forums don’t necessarily work as well as having a personal mentor, because there isn’t the same feeling as being open and honest to a group as when you’re on a 1-2-1 basis with someone you really value…and who totally gets you.

Somebody who won’t let you down too is important; Rachel and I are very reliable and make an effort to have our calls.

If you don’t know anyone like this then I suggest that you start making connections. Suggesting coffee with someone local who works in a similar line of work to you is ideal – start making friends with these people. You may feel as though you haven’t got time for it within your busy week, but if you think of all the times you have a wobble, or want to quit, or feel down, or lose your way – these kind of relationships will keep you on track and help to keep you positive.

Having a mentor can assist you to develop key skills within your industry and help you to realise and work towards your goals and ambitions. Sometimes though, it’s simply someone suggesting or mentioning something to you that then ignites an idea inside that gets your creative juices flowing.

Once you start reaching out to like minded-people it is amazing how many do want to meet up and chat about making their own business work! Try it!

So whether you have a very successful enterprise, or if you are completely starting a new solo venture, then I can assure you that you will get something from having a mentor. I’m excited for how mine develops over this year and am already buzzing at all the creativity I am feeling from it!

If you have any more questions then please don’t hesitate to contact me via any of my social media channels. I’m always happy to share more.

Love, Jess x







Jess Soothill

Jess is a Mother of twins, blogger and writer.

Find me on: Web | Twitter | Facebook


  1. February 1, 2018 / 1:57 pm

    Such a great post and great idea. I definitely need to work on making more connections and being more sociable. I would love this kind of relationship with someone, being able to bounce ideas if each other xx

    • Jess
      February 2, 2018 / 1:45 pm

      Thanks and good luck – I highly recommend reaching out and finding support. It does help with guidance xx

  2. February 1, 2018 / 9:57 pm

    This is such a good idea jess. It makes such a difference to have a like minded friend to bounce ideas around with. I remember Kate from a Playful Day suggesting something similar. I need to try and find someone I think x

    • Jess
      February 2, 2018 / 1:46 pm

      Thanks Jody! So important to have people around you that get what you are doing and can help you to realise your aims. Catch up soon xx

  3. February 2, 2018 / 10:30 am

    I LOVE this!! I need a mentor — without question. As as creative, I’m not particularly business minded and tend to focus on the fluffy things that my brain likes, rather than things that will work from a growth perspective. I need Rach to mentor me too — she’s worked wonders for you Jess!! Fab post! x

    • Jess
      February 2, 2018 / 1:48 pm

      I know what you mean – it’s actually tough being both a highly creative person, and yet also making important business decisions. I think that’s why the more strategic and operational conversations with someone are important. It’s so easy to get stuck in a flow of just creating and not thinking about why xx Good luck!

  4. February 2, 2018 / 2:11 pm

    Thanks, Jess!! I’ve found our calls SO incredibly helpful. You can go crazy dithering over things by yourself. I think the biggest takeaway for me has been realising the difference between how I perceive my blog compared to others. Honest feedback and direction is so important. Thanks for being a superstar!!

    • Jess
      February 3, 2018 / 10:27 am

      Thank you! I agree – it’s been fab to get so much support from you. Here’s to a good year ahead xx

  5. February 3, 2018 / 2:29 pm

    This sounds like a great idea. I could do with an online blog person to chat things through with. I recently reached my 1 year anniversary and considered where do I go from here…i imagine that would have been a useful mentor moment!

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:04 pm

      Oh good luck and hopefully you will find that contact soon xx

  6. February 3, 2018 / 8:25 pm

    Thanks for sharing this. Sounds like this is really working for you both. Love how these things grow and evolve, don’t you?

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:05 pm

      Definitely – I believe in never say never and always keep your options open! xx

  7. February 4, 2018 / 8:17 am

    I love this idea! I come from a similar background to you and have mentored people and set it up for others. I had never considered it could be something that would work in the Blogging world. But it’s exactly what I need right now, as I’m at a crossroad with my blog and would love to chat it through with someone that got it x

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:06 pm

      It’s SO easy to become so consumed in your own work isn’t it? I like being able to ask someone impartial to help me out at times. 🙂 xx

  8. February 4, 2018 / 8:13 pm

    Hey Jess.. I love this and I totally agree!

    I’ve been self-employed as a freelance copywriter for about 7 years now, but I’m only a few months into my blogging journey. I knew I’d benefit so much from a mentor, so I started working with mine just a few weeks ago. It’s been so great for accountability and pushing things forward.

    It’s too easy to think we need to work everything out ourselves, but being self-employed shouldn’t be any different from working for someone else, in terms of recognising that investment in development is so important.

    Oh and I used to work in HR too… Maybe we’ve just got a tendency to be big on mentoring!! 😀 x

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:06 pm

      Ha ha ha I think so 🙂 I think when you have been in that environment you know what works for people. Good luck! xx

  9. February 6, 2018 / 11:28 am

    This is such a great idea to have a mentor. I didn’t realise you and Rachel knew each other so well! How funny that your blogs are both ones I read regularly and LOVE both of them! x

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:06 pm

      Ahh thanks lovely and we LOVE yours too – so much xx

  10. February 6, 2018 / 1:40 pm

    Great idea and one that proves works. I have a lovely blogger friend who has helped me massively to get my blog up and running. Although sometimes I feel like I harass her with my questions etc. It is so so hard to grow your blog without knowing the ins and outs of terminology, you feel inadequate a lot of the time and really disheartened some days. But what I try to remember is be true to myself and remember this is not a job for me it is a hobby. Of course I would love to make it a job one day but I struggle with confidence and am very shy, it also doesn’t help when MOZ drops your DA by 5 – nightmare!

    • Jess
      February 6, 2018 / 2:08 pm

      It’s about having someone to stay focused and ignore the huge amount of BS that often floats about in blogging – which actually isn’t easy when you’re mostly working alone. I am prone to getting sucked into things that take up too much of my time. Rachel is like my sounding board and also helps me to stay normal! xx

  11. February 7, 2018 / 2:45 pm

    How fab that you and Rachel have been helping each other. I agree, talking with like minded people really helps. I don’t have a blogging mentor but I did recently join a writing group. I had no idea how much I would benefit from the feedback and advice that other people give xx

    • Jess
      February 7, 2018 / 8:45 pm

      Sounds great lovely and good for you 🙂 xx

  12. February 23, 2018 / 10:42 am

    I love this post hunny and I truly felt this is why my blog grew and was even read in the early years where I was at every conference and those connections with others were solid. In the last year or so I feel all of them are gone. I need to find a mentor for sure. I find it hard in the blogging world where I don’t have someone to bounce ideas off of sat next to me like an office. I was an office manager with 30 staff under me before blogging then moved into marketing and advertising then writing a book and having babies somehow putting all that together to run my blog on a good day is grand but on a bad day it’s nice to keep up with others with the new ways or new ideas or just someone to get those juices flowing. I think your blog has boomed beautifully in the last few years and I am in awe in all you do and in all your photography skills too. I struggle to take photos of myself and it’s one thing I wanted to do more is share more about myself my love for mama fashion and Interiors but hard not to get frustrated with the photography and not having alight house to go with my ambitions. But so much you said here rings true for me. I don’t want to just write about babies I am more than a mommy. Although currently seems to be all I write about needing more motivation to branch out but fear holds me back. Rachel is amazing too one of the first bloggers I ever met and got friendly with. So glad you have each other.

  13. October 28, 2018 / 9:27 pm

    This is a great idea. It’s always nice when you can bounce off ideas to a like minded person.

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