Tears at preschool: my captured moment


As you may well know Harry and Lottie started preschool this week. A day that we have been looking forward to and preparing for.

I was hoping that on the day there would be no tears.

Day one went really well (I stayed for it) and they loved it. Lots of drawing, playing and singing! The staff and the other children were very nice and the twins seemed to have a great time.

However day two was a little harder.

There were tears when I left them for an hour (to start the process of getting them used to me leaving). Lottie (who has always been clingy and suffered with separation anxiety)ย cried quite a bit when I left her. And when I got back to the school she had red and puffy eyes and looked really upset. The staff said she had been crying and they had tried to comfort and distract her.

Harry, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoyed it! No tears! Had a great time! Bless him.

I feel so sad and anxious about Lottie now. I hope so much that she enjoys it. I really don’t want to see her so upset.

It’s really hard.

So My captured momentย is the photograph above. Lottie and I having cuddles and hugs at home afterwards.

Really hope she improves, and, over time gets to enjoy it. It is still very early days I realise that. Plus they have been so used to just being at home with me. But it breaks your heart seeing them so upset.

I hope that this doesn’t last forever.

‘My captured moment’ is the brilliant new linky by the lovely Heledd at Running in Lavender.

Go check it out!

Running in Lavender
Mami 2 Five


  1. January 8, 2015 / 4:29 pm

    Aw, that is a precious picture. It is heard leaving them isn’t it?! at least she has her brother there with her #mycapturedmoment

    • Jess
      January 8, 2015 / 4:33 pm

      Thank you. I have told him to look after her next week, he said “OK Mummy”! Too cute. It’s so hard knowing they’re upset. Jess xx

  2. January 8, 2015 / 7:22 pm

    Oh honey – what a cute and heart wrenching post. Ella started her new room this week and I have exactly the same going on here. Though, trust me, it really does get better. But yes, it will tug at your heart strings until this day happens. All will be just fine – I promise. Big warm hugs xxxxxxx

    • Jess
      January 8, 2015 / 8:22 pm

      Thanks Steph. Seems like it is very common. Hope Ella gets on OK too. Big hugs – Jess xx

  3. January 8, 2015 / 8:25 pm

    the poor little love. I hope she settles soon, its so hard when they don’t. #mycapturedmoment

    • Jess
      January 8, 2015 / 8:37 pm

      Thank you. I really hope so! It’s not great seeing your little ones so upset! Thanks again, Jess x

  4. January 8, 2015 / 8:29 pm

    Gorgeous photo Jess. She will end up loving it. I promise. #mycapturedmoment

    • Jess
      January 8, 2015 / 8:38 pm

      Thanks Karen. Hope so. Had a lot of plans for those few hours each week, and now I just feel awful for leaving her ๐Ÿ™ Jess xx

  5. January 8, 2015 / 9:17 pm

    Oh i really feel for you its horrible leaving them when they’re upset it goes against all your natural instincts shell get used to it and it’ll get easier! x

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:38 pm

      Thanks hun. I didn’t expect to feel this rubbish about it! Hoping she gets on OK soon. Cheers, Jess x

  6. January 8, 2015 / 9:27 pm

    What a gorgeous photo. A beautiful moment between Mummy and Daughter. My little girl used to cry when I left her at Nursery. She now says “you can go now Mummy” and I struggle to get her to leave. I hope it doesn’t last too long for you x

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:38 pm

      That’s fantastic news! I am sure she will be like that soon. Thanks for the comments, Jess x

  7. January 8, 2015 / 9:51 pm

    It’s so hard, isn’t it? My boys both started nursery at six months, so we completely avoided separation anxiety, but my little girl has always been home with me. I’ve had to work really hard at getting her comfortable with me leaving her… and she seems okay now, but she won’t start preschool till September! It might take a little time, but Lottie will be fine xx #mycapturedmoments

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:37 pm

      Thank you so much. I am sure she just needs to build up her confidence and get to know them and she will be OK. Plus she needs to understand I will always come back and pick them up!! Jess x

  8. January 8, 2015 / 10:06 pm

    ah bless her, it took Jack a while to get used to, he cried loads at first but ended up loving it , Joe went from 12 weeks, i know that early but i couldn’t stand the thought of him being so clingy like Jack was x

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:36 pm

      There is a big part of it that is to do with being at home with me all this time. However I am sure she will get more used to it, and the staff, and start to feel more comfortable. Hope so anyway! Jess x

  9. January 8, 2015 / 10:47 pm

    I’m sure it will get easier – there’s so much to get used to right now. They will be running off to join their friends in no time.


    Jenna at Tinyfootsteps xx

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:34 pm

      Oh I hope so lovely. Fingers crossed. Will keep you updated. Jess x

  10. January 9, 2015 / 10:45 am

    Oh Jess ๐Ÿ™ I don’t even know what to say besides it will get better in time. x

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 12:33 pm

      Thank you so much! Here’s hoping ๐Ÿ™‚ xx

  11. January 9, 2015 / 1:55 pm

    ah – your photo brought a little lump to my throat. It’s so heart-rending when your babies are clingy but you have to try to prise them away. I had a similar scene at pre-school drop-off this morning and it never gets any easier to see them like this. I hope things get better over time x

    • Jess
      January 9, 2015 / 2:57 pm

      Good luck to you then too. Hard isn’t it? I know she loves being there with the others, but when I go she obviously is worried. Lets hope they get better and enjoy it soon. Jess xx

  12. January 9, 2015 / 8:57 pm

    Oh Jess, you poor thing. I’m sure it will get easier but I know that doesn’t help you right now. Bless little Lotty, maybe when she gets used to the fact that you do come back every day, she’ll start to relax and enjoy herself? On the plus side this a super cute captured moment of obviously a difficult day. Sending lots of hugs to you both!!

    Thank you so much for linking up to #MyCapturedMoment and supporting me with your kind words xxx

    • Jess
      January 10, 2015 / 12:46 pm

      I know. She loved seeing me afterwards and we had such lovely cuddles! Great linky and great to be joining in xx

  13. January 9, 2015 / 10:15 pm

    Oh you poor love. Hugs. Poor little Lottie too. I don’t know how I’m going to cope. So pleased Harry enjoyed it. You’re doing an amazing job huni. Mwah xxxxx

    • Jess
      January 10, 2015 / 9:37 am

      Thanks honey, I know – very difficult! I hope it gets better. Jess x

  14. January 10, 2015 / 11:45 pm

    Aww, it’s so hard when they cry isn’t it ๐Ÿ™ But don’t feel bad, its better for them to get used to you leaving for just a couple of hours now rather than when they go to full time school.
    Having worked in preschool settings I can assure you it does get easier! It is extremely rare for children to take longer than a week or two to settle in. Although I feel the need to warn you that it is normal to have tears when you first leave only for them to run off within two minutes happy as Larry for quite a while longer than that! I think they just want us to miss them lol #MyCapturedMoment

    • Jess
      January 11, 2015 / 8:33 am

      I know! Totally pulling at my heartstrings! I am sure they will be better once they feel more confident and happier with the surroundings. Thanks for your lovely comment. Jess x

  15. Another Bun
    January 11, 2015 / 8:47 am

    Oh bless her. My little man is very much attached to mummy as well, and he does get upset on me leaving too. Hope next week is easier for you both

    • Jess
      January 11, 2015 / 12:24 pm

      Yes me too. I knew it would be tough, seeing as she’s always been clingy but it was still hard to deal with. Thanks for the lovely comments, Jess x

  16. January 11, 2015 / 8:59 am

    Oh Jess how hard for you! Despite the tears behind it though, what an absolutely beautiful picture! You know of course that it will get better for you all in time and although there will be some hard days, overall it will be good. Hope you’re having a lovely weekend. Mim ๐Ÿ™‚ #SundayStars

    • Jess
      January 11, 2015 / 12:22 pm

      Thanks so much! So kind. I have got to stick it out because they will need to go to school at some point soon, and so onwards and upwards! Thanks, Jess x

  17. Rachel
    January 11, 2015 / 8:01 pm

    oh bless! its heart breaking isn’t it. It won’t last forever. Precious photo though x

    • Jess
      January 11, 2015 / 9:09 pm

      Thanks Rachel. Hope so. Jess x

  18. January 11, 2015 / 9:19 pm

    Oh bless her, and you, I know exactly how you feel. Monkey started playgroup on Friday and was also really upset though he did do better than I thought he would. We are back again tmw and he says he is looking forward to it and I really hope hw enjoys it. Everyone says it gets better gradually and within weeks it will be a lot easier, fingers crossed for both of us! I love how your little man was loving it from the start though! Xx #sundaystars

    • Jess
      January 11, 2015 / 9:24 pm

      I know…go Harry! Thank goodness. Both of them hating it would be awful! Yes good luck and I hope he enjoys it too. Keep me posted ๐Ÿ™‚ Jess x

  19. January 14, 2015 / 9:55 pm

    This is such a gorgeous picture. Lottie is holding onto you so tightly. It must be so hard to leave them when they are so upset. Hopefully, it will help Lottie having Harry there. I am sure she’ll settle soon and start really enjoying herself. Thanks for linking up to #SundaysStars. Hugs Mrs H xxxx

    • Jess
      January 15, 2015 / 8:29 am

      Yes hope so hun, xx

  20. February 8, 2015 / 3:59 pm

    It is tough but it really does help them learn to make little friends and explore things we wouldn’t necessary think of doing at home (mainly messy play!!). It will be OK. Harry now sometimes even forgets to say goodbye to me as he runs off whereas before he’d cling onto me.

    • Jess
      February 8, 2015 / 4:09 pm

      Thank you – and I am sure we will get there! x

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